Hope in the Waiting

You guys know I walked through some very difficult years as we were trying to start a family. Infertility is no joke. During that time, I didn’t have many friends who had walked through it. In fact, it seemed as if literally all of my friends were getting pregnant. I couldn’t find very many resources to help me cope and deal with the pain and frustration. I felt alone.

After opening up and sharing my story via blog, I realized that actually quite a few people had walked through infertility and miscarriages. It was just never talked about. What woman wants people to know about the agony she is experiencing inside? I did. I wanted to share so that others didn’t feel alone and isolated like I did. I wanted to share because I knew God was working in my waiting, and sharing my story meant that many more people could see His power and glory.

I had friends who had friends that were struggling with infertility, which connected me to complete strangers that I could minister to. I found myself continually looking back through my journals and trying to remember what had been helpful to me. I put together a list of scripture, songs, prayers, and literature that helped encourage me through that part of my journey. I hope you find these resources helpful, but my ultimate encouragement is for you to seek Him. Walk with Jesus. Spend time daily and constantly with Him. He is working in your waiting, and He has not forgotten you.

Scriptures

• Romans 5:3-5 “Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.” 
• Genesis 8:1 – But God remembered Noah and all the wild animals and the livestock that were with him in the ark, and he sent a wind over the earth, and the waters receded.
• Psalm 44 – I love this because it describes how I felt day to day during my journey. I’d have days where I was full of hope and encouragement, and I just knew God was faithful. And then I’d have days where I doubted, I was distraught, discouraged, and downhearted. This Psalm captures the roller coaster of emotions, but always returns to acknowledge God’s faithfulness.
• Psalm 119:114 – You are my hiding place and my shield; I hope in your word.
• Psalm 3:2-5 – Many are saying of me, “God will not deliver him.” But you, Lord, are a shield around me, my glory, the One who lifts my head high. I call out to the Lord, and he answers me from his holy mountain. I lie down and sleep; I wake again, because the Lord sustains me.
• Luke 18:35-43 – A blind man sees Jesus passing by and asks Jesus to restore his sight, and Jesus heals him because of his faith.
• Psalm 147 – This Psalm beautifully proclaims His power and faithfulness. Believe these words, my dear sisters.
• Zephaniah 3:17 – The LORD your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing.
• Psalm 40 – I waited patiently for the Lord; He turned to me and heard my cry. You are my help and my deliverer, Oh my God, do not delay.
•  Exodus 14:13-14 – And Moses said to the people, “Fear not, stand firm, and see the salvation of the Lord, which he will work for you today. For the Egyptians whom you see today, you shall never see again. The Lord will fight for you, and you have only to be silent.”
• Psalm 31: 9-19 – Be merciful to me, O Lord, for I am in distress….But I trust in you, O Lord; I say, “You are my God.” ….Oh, how abundant is your goodness, which you have stored up for those who fear you and worked for those who take refuge in you, in the sight of the children of mankind!

Songs

• Though You Slay Me by Shane and Shane (featuring John Piper). Y’all. This song has so much truth in it. I encourage you to listen and write down the truths from the lyrics and especially Piper’s sermon excerpt. I get chills every time I listen to it.
• Good Good Father by Chris Tomlin. A solid reminder that He is faithful, and He is a Good Father.
• Be Still by Chuck Hooten. (Shout out to our worship pastor from Shoreline!) Again, just another reminder of God’s faithfulness and caring spirit towards His people.
• Sovereign Over Us by Aaron Keyes. “You are working in our waiting….Your plans are still to prosper; You have not forgotten us. You’re with us in the fire and the flood.”
• What Love is This by Kari Jobe. “You never change; You are the God you say you are. When I’m afraid  you calm and still my heart. ….You’re always enough for me. You’re all I need!”
• Through All of It by Colton Dixon. “Life’s been a journey, Oh but You have been my God through all of it.”

Prayers

These prayers are straight out of the prayer journal I was using during this time of infertility. Some are full prayers for that day, some are just excerpts. All are raw emotions.

• Father, you know the desires of our hearts. You’ve given us this strong desire to start a family. God, we know you’ve been present every step of the way. You’ve never left us and you never will. Give us the peace and strength to continue to trust you and praise you for all that you have blessed us with. Please turn your face to us, Lord. We need you every second of this journey. You are still good even when you lead us into difficult seasons. We know this is part of your plan and that our story can be used for your glory. We cling to your strong right hand.
• Lord, we know you are faithful. We know that you have not forgotten us. Keep our hearts close to you so that our desires are your desires for us.
• Lord, remind me that I will always need you- regardless of what I have or don’t have. I will always need you more than anything I ever could have. You are my only hope Lord. Not a baby, new car, new house. All of these things fall flat in comparison to you and they will not follow me in to eternity. God let these truths sink into my heart and be more than just words on paper. Help me believe that you are so much greater than anything this world could offer.
• Give us strength to trust you and remain focused on you despite our circumstances. May we turn to you in the good times and the bad. Your death to bring us life is so much greater than our current wants or needs. All we need is you!
• Help me to embrace my story and remember your sovereignty over me. Regardless of how many friends get pregnant or how long it takes me, YOU are writing my story and it is perfect. Heal my heart of the bitterness, jealousy, and pain I feel. Remind me that your plans are perfect for everyone.
• Lord, sometimes I have no words other than “we need you.” We’re ready for you to do something big.
• It’s 2am and I know I must be awake for a reason. Lord, in all things, we have no choice but to trust you. There is absolutely nothing we can do in our own power to change our current situation. Remind us of that and help us believe it. Whatever happens Monday is in your hands. Give me the peace I know I can have only in you. Regardless of any outcome, remind us that you are all we need. You alone bring us joy and everything we need. You are more than enough.
• God, we know you are fighting for us. (Ex. 14:14) We know you’re writing our story into something beautiful. Give us strength, peace, and trust on those bad days when it’s easier to just take control or blame you. Remind us of your sovereignty and your goodness. Open our eyes to the many blessings we’ve had in the meantime. We ask that you go with us today and help us make a plan that somehow glorifies you.
• You always tell your children to come as we are, no matter what. I’m here, Lord. I’m here and I feel lost. All I know is that I need you. I need you and only you. You are bigger than all of these circumstances. We know this is all part of your story for us. May we just cling to your heart, trust wholly in you, and peacefully enjoy the ride. Lord calm my heart and mind. All these things will pass, and you remain contact through it all.