Confession time!! I AM AN IDENTITY THIEF.
No, I didn’t steal anyone’s credit cards or social security numbers. (Although I’ve watched enough crime shows that I think I probably could.)
I’m talking about stealing my own identity. Crazy, right?! But I bet you’re guilty too. Have you ever wanted to be more like that perfect girl in class or at work? Ever gotten your haircut like your favorite celeb (and then it doesn’t look near as cool)? Ever compromised your standards to fit into a crowd? Have you compared yourself to someone else and concluded that he/she was better than you? What about feeling less of a mom because you didn’t pack a lunch as cool as Stephanie’s mom did?
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve scrolled through Instagram or Facebook with these thoughts, “Man, I wish I looked like that when I was pregnant.” “Their kids are always smiling, and they never fight!” “I wish I could go on as many cool trips as they do!” “I wish my house was that clean all the time.” “Ugh, THAT must be nice.” “She literally has the perfect life.”
Let’s talk about something real quick. First of all, their kids DO fight. Their house is NOT that clean all the time. Her life is NOT perfect. And all those vacations they go on probably suck. (not really. they are probably nice. but you get the point.) Social media can be the devil. It causes us to think everybody else has it all together because that’s what they WANT us to think. We see only the good parts of people’s lives. We see the things they are proud of and want to show the world. And while there isn’t anything wrong with sharing those parts of your life, we have to be reminded that a few pictures or videos is not an accurate representation of that person’s REAL life.
I bet their kids complained or argued about something later that day. And that person probably cleaned up their living room before taking that picture.
Social media aside, even the way we present ourselves in public is not always an accurate representation of who we really are. Regardless of what we’re dealing with internally, we can always slap on a smile when we’re around other people. “Hey, how are you?” “Oh I’m fine, how are you?” “Just fine!” *I can’t let them know that I don’t have it all together.* *I can’t let them know that I fought with my husband in the car on the way over here.* *I can’t let them know that I’m hurting inside because all I want is a baby but I can’t get pregnant.* *I can’t let them know that we are struggling financially, and I’m not sure if we can pay rent this month.* *I can’t let them know that my kid talked back to me today.*
Sometimes people will see me at church and say, “Wow, I can’t believe you got all the girls here and you are dressed!” HA! If you only knew what my morning really looked like. If you only knew that I had to wash beans and applesauce out of my hair before leaving the house. If you only knew how many times I had to change my outfit because somebody spit up on me. If you only heard the ear-piercing cries in the car the whole way here. But those aren’t the things that I share regularly. Because I like giving the impression that our morning was full of butterflies and giggles and easy-to-dress babies. I like pretending to be supermom. I like to appear sane and relaxed and put-together.
It’s our natural instinct to want people to see the best of us, but it’s also our own worst enemy. Because we allow ourselves to believe that our neighbor is better than us. We compare our own REAL life with their PORTRAYAL of real life.
Friends, stop stealing your identity. Don’t attempt to be someone you aren’t. Be content with what the Lord has BLESSED YOU WITH (see previous post) and stop wishing you had what someone else has. Be confident in your appearance because He created you in His image. That celebrity you look up to–yeah they’ve got the money, beauty, and fame, but they’ve got a world of problems with it. Your neighbor that appears to have an amazing life–there’s much more under the surface than you know.
I have two challenges for you today.
- Be content with who you are and who God created you to be. Genesis 1:27 – “So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.” Stop comparing yourself to celebs, neighbors, siblings, and everyone else. God created you to be you, and her to be her, and him to be him. You were created perfectly just as He wanted you to be. How arrogant and ignorant of us to think that we can make ourselves into something better than He can? Our confidence and assurance is in Him, not how well we can act or look like someone else. Proverbs 3:26 – “for the LORD will be your confidence…” Look up! Look to Him for assurance, not yourself and certainly not your neighbor.
- Experience true community by being REAL with one another. What if we stopped putting up facades and really let people in on our messiness? What if we were honest with our brothers and sisters in Christ about what life is really like right now? God gave us an incredible gift of community–people around you who love and care for you. Let them in! Be vulnerable, open, honest. Nobody expects you to be perfect, and if we all embrace our shortcomings as humans, we might experience fewer feelings of inadequacy. Nobody is perfect, no matter what their Instagram account says. Romans 3:23 – “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” We all have messes. Let’s experience them together.